Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us�
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Randomize
