We won't sleep together?
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Randomize
