It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh�
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
Randomize
