You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
Randomize
