He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
Randomize