She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize
