road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
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