I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
This girl is more easily done than said...
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Randomize
