Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize
