Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Randomize
