How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
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