sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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