Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(843): View more from South Carolina

This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.

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(609): View more from New Jersey

if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow

Fav 10 1169 1771
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(540): View more from Virginia

I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places

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(913): View more from Kansas

sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.

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(712): View more from Iowa

Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.

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(908): View more from New Jersey

Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.

Fav 2 882 1194
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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!

(215): View more from Pennsylvania

Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf

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(540): View more from Virginia

After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"

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