Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
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