Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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