I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
Never underestimate the power of titties
Randomize
