Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Blood and glitter go together right?
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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