Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
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