I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
Randomize
