He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
Randomize
