Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
I just blew my weed a kiss
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
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