only if we run a train.
done.
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
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