1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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