I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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