Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Randomize