mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
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