You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
