the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
