he thought i was a dude.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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