Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Randomize
