: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
Randomize
