Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
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