Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
Randomize
