My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
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