i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
Randomize
