I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
