im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Randomize
