Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
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