in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
