Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
