I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
is that a dick in a sweater?
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
Randomize
