I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Randomize
