on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
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