Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
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