I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
