What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
Randomize
