Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Randomize
