Sry I called you an 8
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Randomize
