Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Randomize
