I never want to see another naked old woman again.
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
